This topic has been broached before but, in light of the recent changes to the Stack Exchange's Code of Conduct on the matter, I'm wondering if there's a conflict that needs to be addressed.

Our policy, based on the selected answer to the question in the first link, seems to be that we do not care about pronoun genders, there are larger considerations to focus on:

This means that 'he/him', 'they/their', and 'she/her' pronouns are correct, and none of them are incorrect. Good answers simply maintain continuity [...]

The CoC has been updated with the following directives:

1.“Use stated pronouns (when known).”

2.“Prefer gender-neutral language when uncertain

Does the RPG.SE policy conflict with the general SE Code of Conduct?

How closely do we need to police this update, if at all (and instead rely on users to self-police)?

Does this have any impact on the fact that many system sourcebooks default to using feminine pronouns?

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    \$\begingroup\$ I'm uncertain, does that last bit also bring up the idea of altering quotes from rulebooks to avoid pronoun use? \$\endgroup\$ Commented Oct 10, 2019 at 21:00
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    \$\begingroup\$ regarding the last bit: When quoting a published work, shouldn't we quote the work as written? \$\endgroup\$ Commented Oct 10, 2019 at 21:12
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    \$\begingroup\$ I would think one should quote it as written but I mentioned it because it seemed relevant considering the answer to that question states "Female pronouns are used to be gender-inclusive" and the CoC suggests that this is not the case. \$\endgroup\$
    – Rykara
    Commented Oct 10, 2019 at 21:16
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    \$\begingroup\$ they didn't seem to include this in their documentation anywhere, but one of the admins approved a Wikipedia link listing current gender-neutral english pronouns to be he, she, they, s/he. I'm not sure I can locate that post anymore, I don't remember which post/comment it was on \$\endgroup\$ Commented Oct 10, 2019 at 21:37

1 Answer 1


No, it does not.

In a clarifying comment by CesarM (the user maintaining the FAQ) he states (emphasis mine):

We recommend that you use gender-neutral they if you don't know the person's pronouns. That's a recommendation, not a CoC violation. However, if you use "he" as default and someone asks you to refer to them by something else, please start referring to them by that going forward. It's okay if you make an honest mistake because you forgot, but try

This is in exact alignment with what is stated in our policy that you linked to:

Unless otherwise stated, all questions are gender agnostic.

I personally think that nobody should be harassed, or be in the red for guessing wrong on how someone wants to be called,


  • If the gender isn't stated or given by the author's own words, it is recommended to try and stay neutral but it isn't a CoC violation to continue to use your prefered writing pronoun.
  • If it is given, use what they've used.
  • If it wasn't given, but is then subsequently clarified, use that.
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    \$\begingroup\$ Note also that our SE policy is that way because all of those listed pronouns are used gender neutrally. 'he' as a gender neutral pronoun dates to at least 1745 and possibly way older, 'she' as a gender neutral pronoun dates to at least the mid 2000's and possibly as much as 40ish years prior, and 'they' as a gender neutral pronoun dates to at least 1375 \$\endgroup\$ Commented Oct 19, 2019 at 18:03
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    \$\begingroup\$ Since we allow all sorts of English here, we take it in good faith that you are using the correct gender-nuetral pronouns for your group-- and you are welcome regardless of that group's stance on feminist language reform. Only when gendering is clearly not happening in good faith is not okay, in which case it's a violation of Be Nice and consequently a Big Deal; as a separate rule from the network, we also apply Be Nice to site management. \$\endgroup\$ Commented Oct 19, 2019 at 18:29
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    \$\begingroup\$ It is funny how RPG.SE's incarnation of the pronoum thing is at the same time way older and incredibly better than the one as stated on the new CoC. \$\endgroup\$
    – T. Sar
    Commented Oct 24, 2019 at 11:20

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